I haven’t posted anything for a while, but I’ve been busy making things and working on a few projects, maybe too busy.
I’ve had a sense of… hmmm… maybe uncomfortableness about my crafting ‘career’ and where I’m going and I’ve been struggling with what to do about it.
What made it more difficult is realising just how big a part my mum played in my crafts.
My mum bought me my first handmade rag doll, a topsy-turvy Cinderella who still takes pride of place over 40 years later. She took me to my first craft fair and introduced me to a lady who taught me my first craft, quilling.
When she was making cakes she would sit me down to help her make flowers from fondant and it was mum who encouraged me with endless craft supplies. When I had stalls at craft fairs she would turn up and sit for hours dealing with customers and it was mum who told endless people about the things I made.
It’s only now she’s gone that I really recognise how big a part of my crafting world she played. Whenever I made something I was proud of, the first thing I did was go and show my mum. When I was deciding which options to choose for university it was mum who I discussed it with, and now I’m in a place where I feel uncomfortable in my craft world and my confidant isn’t here.
And so, I’ve been quiet, trying to figure out my next steps in a different way.
I was listening to the Phil Laeger version of I’m in his hands earlier.
When I describe my crafting as unfortableness, I think it’s really a newness.
I could say that God spoke to me about a new way last week, but it’s been a gradual moving towards something new that’s been going on for some years, to this final ‘reveal’ I guess.
From the quilting sessions at university in the second year, the regular thoughts of giving my crafts to God in the third year. The quilting project, then the growing thoughts on craft groups in churches and how they could be used as a ministry.
Making the boundless salvation quilt, meeting someone who instead of just saying “No”, told me I would carve my own path.
Most recently the zoom craft group, the enabled craft sessions, having the right courses and professionals come into my life at the right time, meeting someone who pointed me in the right direction for the Art therapy course.
All the little coincidences (God-incidences?) that bring me here and now with a plan or vision for where I’m going next.
What I always thought was a journey between mum and me has, all along included a third person, who is constant, who is on our side and who has a plan for us that far outweighs any idea or dream we could make up for ourselves.
This is a panel for my next quilt, you might recognise the image from a few posts ago, well this is the machine embroidered panel.
It’s based on the words of the Salvation Army song
Then how much more shall God, our Father, in love forgive.
Which is from the musical based on the story of Hosea.
